the 11th, the 11th

First & foremost, Happy Mothers' Day to all mothers all arnd the werld. May God bless all of yous for your sacrifice and never ending love in bringing all of us up.
I love my Mum alot. There is no one else who can replace my mother. I would never trade anything in the werld for Mak. Despite all the arguments, misunderstanding i had with her, nothing can ever make my love for her fade. She is my true love. I thank God for blessing me with the most wonderful Emak ever. Thank you God for sending down a Mum who will always protect and care for her child, who will always never give up in bringing the child up holistically, who will always advise and will keep me away from any danger. Without her, I think I will be faraway, distant, or even pregnant. (Okay, that was exaggerating) So yeah, Emak I love you alot! You are my one and only. Muacks!
Yesterday, Soccer match at Woodlands Sec was cancelled, so off to Changi Beach. Basically, i took a nice nap and i camwhored. God. Camwhore.



Then after went to Nenek's place where we have our usual Saturday gathering. Everything went well, all was cheerful and stuff. That was where Mum sold her handmade jewelry and i learnt how to fold paper hearts. So i started to fold like 11. Will be using it for later.
And one more thing.Today's the 11th. It marks the 20th monthsary of Me and Shadiq. gahhhhhhs.
Baby, it's now the 20th months of us being together. That's 1 year and 8 months. I remembered from our very first date, how shy and ignorant we are of each other. We never wanted to admit how much we love each other. Now i just wanna tell the whole werld. Since I can't, I'll just tell the whole of CyberWerld. I love you Shadiq, I really do. We've had really tough times. Those times when we hafta run and hide from my Mum almost everyday. Those times when I've neglected you and you've neglected me. Those times when you weren't being yourself, you were being some one else, some one dangerous, some one so selfish. However, I love you nonetheless, because I know you aren't like that. I know the real you won't do that. And then when we went through hell, when we nearly lost each other. When i gave up, but you realise, yeah you and me, we were meant to be. It's true, we really are. Those days when we went our separate ways, I was itching to tell you how much i miss you, how much I want to come back and say you'll stand by side, I was dying inside, I was hiding so much for the sake of myself. I knew I gotta stay strong without you, because I thought I'll never be with you again for a long time, or most probably not ever. But on that day when we met after the breakup,that day when you told me how you've cried,how much you've missed me, that day when you told you'll wait until I can accept you back again, I knew, this time I won't have any regrets. Now, we've grown. Grown with each other, grown with our love. I hope it never fades, because all the times with you are cherished. When we meet, i smile almost every minute. When I'm down, you'll never fail to cheer me up. When i miss you terribly and tell you that it hurts so bad, you'll constantly remind me that it is not hurt, but more love I'm feeling. You made me optimistic when I'm suffering from pessimism. You were there when I feel shitty about myself, you understand me when nobody else does. Basically, you made me feel love from within. Every little thing you do is kept in my heart. I still remember our first kiss, I was younger then, I didn't how to kiss, neither do I know how to react. Still, I remember how I feel. All flushed, filled with so much euphoria, I could swell and burst any moment. Baby, till now I still feel that way. You make my heart beats fast and slow at the same time. Make me jump and twirl like a psychotic ballerina. Make me smile so hard I can feel my face going numb. Make me sing all the love songs in the toilet when i bathe. Make me hug a pillow, like i was hugging you. Your love, is more than the Pyramids of Giza, or the painstaking effort of the World War 2 surviviors, or the disappearance of Mas Selamat, or the 9/11 mysteries, or the hidden beach in Thailand, or bboying tricks 2000 and UFO done together, or thousands of cute kitties put together in my room, it is more than the Great Wall of China, or the New World Order planned by demons. Your love is more than anything else in this werld. Maybe I'm exaggerating, but what do I care because all that matters is you and me. The rest we push aside. Shadiq, I love you much. I can't say anymore to describe. I hope you can see how much you mean to me. More than the werld, more than the whole Universe. Baby I love you. Happy 20th monthsary, love. xoxo

I can't remember when it was good
moments of happiness elude
maybe I just misunderstood

all of the love we left behind
watching the flash backs intertwine
memories I will never find

so I'll love whatever you become
and forget the reckless things we've done
I think our lives have just begun
I think our lives have just begun

and I'll feel my world crumbling
I'll feel my life crumbling
I'll feel my soul crumbling away
and falling away
falling away with you

Cheers.